Welcome to my (not so humble) blog…
Warrior Women Don't Blink --------- Stories of How I Became a Samurai on the Quest for Love and Justice
Read “Scary Happiness and the Corporate Corpse Revival”, published in Quail Bell Magazine in March 2023.
Claws
A right to bear arms.I write to bear arms.My arms grow bear fur.Bear arms with clawsClaw out your eyesWhile you watch your kids die. I wish I had bear arms.I’d pull out your alarms.I’d disarm your swarmsOf…
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The Golden Epidural
Originally published in Twenty Bellows Matriarch: Meditations on Motherhood (2025) The epidural was created by someone who cared. I looked up the history once I realized how this individual has saved my life three times. I know…
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The View From a Child
I hug my dog every morning, I pick her up, put her in my lap, and kiss her as if we’ve been separated for weeks, months, ages of time. She licks my face as I smoosh her…
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Dear Canyon of the Daniel – A letter to my unborn child, written at 10 weeks pregnant.
Full disclosure, I’m now 28 weeks pregnant and feeling a little better, but not much. Dear Canyon of the Daniel, or Daniel of the Canyon (No, the first one is better. That’s your real name, regardless of…
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Come Out From Under Your Shel
Originally published in Twenty Bellows Welcoming The Muse: Meta and Other Forms (2024) Photo credit: Shel Silverstein, Where the Sidewalk Ends If you were to ask who pushed me along in this world, it’d be Dylan, King,…
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The Balancing Act
People exist all over the place -painters, writers, astronauts in space.They grow as a seed in the smallest of spots.Their character forms designs on their pots. They sprout limbs, eyes, brains, and feelings.Their organs operate without getting…
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The Unspoken Land – From Spill Your Guts and Use Your Words
Most of your friendsknow of their names.Others say they areprivates or shames.But I know they servean important purpose,so much so thatwe do them a disserviceby hiding them inthe drawers and closets,just come out and say them,the names…
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My Veins – A Poem from Spill Your Guts and Use Your Words
This one goes out to all the vampires and labbies out there. Keep on sticking and keep that microscope lit. I used to thinkthe blue strings in my wristswere sparkly mirages,not roads that take twists. Through my…
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My Feet – A Poem from Spill Your Guts and Use Your Words
I attempt to trampleTen thousand steps each day,It’s struggling yet fulfilling,My shoes they start to fray,The bones in my feet,They ache and complain,The muscles persisting,Feeling no refrain. My feet are my livelihood,My solo means of movementIf they…
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I’ll Be Doggone
*Title stolen from a cool Marvin Gaye song you should listen to right now.* What if people came back as dogs?The Poodles, Labradoodles, Shih Tzus, and Pugs?Slathering, lathering, sopping up love,Won’t you,Why don’t you,Pick my poop up…
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Keep Going
I sit and recalibrate.Remember who I was before.Who I have becomeWho I want to be.Who I remain. I am not that big,Not that smart,Not entirely motivated all the time,But I’m fierce,I’ll rip your face off with my…
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Stick Your Tongue Between the Slat
ThisThoseTheseThatStick your tongueBetween the slatOf your teethThose pearly whites,Say it, spray it,Cling your tongue tight, Then push it againstThe top of those teeth,Get the thick tongueUp off its seat. If you shoveYour tongue enough,It might knockYour head…
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I Bought a Crystal Singing Bowl (Alternatively titled: You Do You, But Please Don’t)
This could offend people? I once believedAll it would takeWas a good attitudeAnd a piece of cakeTo share with my friendsWhen we get up to heavenBut I was sadlyAnd terribly mistaken I found it took fearAnd greed…
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Gale the Snail: Or how I learned to stop worrying and start imitating Dr. Seuss
Each night a snail gets ahold of my mail,She reads to the extent her heart is contentShe mellows and stews about daily past newsAnd when she is through she spews from the blues. This fanciful snail is…
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Tree People Are Free People
What if people returned as trees?Their hair color matching the hues of the leaves.Pine, poplar, redwood, and bonsai,Now Penny, Patricia, Remington, and Sly.Their personality coming through the stems and the crooksOf the branches they climbed as young…
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My Nose
An excerpt from Spill Your Guts, my future collection of fun poems about body parts for both children and adults to enjoy, but mostly for children. (Read this to your kids, gather their comments, and fling them…
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Flying Around the Bluebird Music Festival
I like to go in cold on shows sometimes; it pronounces the musician’s hunger and leaves room for surprises, like watching college basketball or the Racing Sausages during a Brewers game. Starving f*cking artists are in it…
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I Yelled “F*&K” at Disney World
I yelled “Fuck” at Disney World.Not because the rides were bitchin’.But because I found my kid in a strollerBy herself.While my dad went into the Hall of Presidents. His legs needed rest while they suffered from being…
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The Zit on My Neck
I once read Guts, a short by Chuck Palahniuk of which he said caused people to pass out and claim head injuries at public readings, and it was the grossest, most disturbing thing I’ve ever read. I…
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Girl, I Did Not Know You Could Get Down Like That: A Devotion to Depression
I keep coming back here where everything slipped It’s been two months since my partially-formed, 12-week baby was ejected from my vagina through a strong cough while living in there for three days and traveling 1000 miles…
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My Scary Miscarry (And Maybe Yours As Well)
Getting this out days before the holidays seems cruel but also comforting. What better time to admit sorrow than when knee-deep in the mulled cheer and the two-month timeframe when it feels like all the people lose all…
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Mama Called the Doctor and the Doctor Fled…
In another effort to emulate Jackson Browne, this post is written as I sit in a UCHealth cafeteria, minutes before my doctor’s appointment. Help us all. And I write this in haste and frustration, keeping the tone…
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Contemplations
Time to trade in my beer gut for a baby gut. Now I can blame my overeating of pasta and my favorite junk foods on “cravings.” The children acted like whirling dervishes the second they found out…
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Put That In Your Handmade, Artisanal Pipe and Cold-Smoke It
My one year anniversary in the vendor market world hits soon, and I remember the first day like it was yesterday, mostly because it was only one year ago and anything prior feels either like it happened…
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Running Away Towards Home
Vio-Lotta-Letta-Louwent for a walk not knowing where to,with one shoe brown, and the other blue,she strutted softly without a clue. She was on a mission, for what, for who?She knew not of, but had her dog named…
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Listening To Someone Write
Published in a hotel laundry room, in true Jackson Browne-esque, rockstar fashion. I hear it in my daily tasks The man who wants to be heard The slogans, pitches, brands, new logos, Get in while the getting…
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The Pre-Menstruating Monster of Jellybean Village
All women will bleed, everybody will poop, only men will fart. -A non-serious, amateur haiku by Jamie Pitts Mah Mah Mah My Persona Lately I have been unleashing various personas as a way to build confidence and…
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Only the Good Die Young
Be true to your school, and let your colors fly My grade school was my second home growing up, partly because my parents worked full-time and it offered reasonably priced before and after-school care, but I hung…
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Walk Like a [Wo]Man, Talk Like a [Wo]Man
Once upon a time, my first daughter was referred to speech therapy. Once upon another time, my second daughter was referred to speech therapy. In both twisted tales, each daughter was under the age of eighteen months. …
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Any Drink: Ima Grip and Ima Sip
When the topic of drinking came up the other day, I knew I wanted to write about it but immediately dismissed the idea as it made me feel naked, vulnerable, and evil, thus making me want to…
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Ain’t No Pup Like the One I Had
This year my dog Rigby and I are turning the same age – 35 – and for the curious minds out there, of course we are planning a bomb-ass birthday bash. But before we party hard, I…
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Be Kind To Your Web-Footed Friends, For the Duck May Be Somebody’s Mother
On my last writing roundabout, I received a complimentary visit by friends I had made from my previous stay. These companions happened to have web-feet and came in waterfowl form. This time though, the ducks had multiplied…
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Shoot Butt Darts, Not People
Daydream Believer As an Idealist, I sift through the daydreams of my mind on an all too frequent basis; I ponder mindless topics such as the future of our melting world (lots of post-apocalyptic prep going on…
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Let No Personality Go Unanalyzed
“All I can do is be me, whoever that is.” Bob Dylan, my theoretical best friend. Hits From The [Organizational Development] Bong Looking back on my seven-year career in healthcare leadership, the most profound growth I experienced…
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You’re My Best Friend, Best Friend With Benefits
Dr. Stay-At-Home Mom: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Broken System. Life has swallowed me up so much as I work on being a more involved mother, forming better habits, and breaking into…
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Balance is Bogus, Chaos is Queen
We are six months into the new phase of life with me staying home with the gremlins and with Frank thriving, providing, and profiling in his career in cannabis (such a cool thing to say). The girls…
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Writing Roundabout, Writing Walkabout; Green Jacket, Gold Jacket, Who Gives a $#!+
Well folks, here we are. It has been over thirty days since my last post, and I am not proud of it. In fact, I failed several goals I was aiming to accomplish, and yet, somehow, I…
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Motivational Speech #1: Get Your Motor Running, Head Out On the Highway, Do Your V-Sit Crunches, And Whatever Comes Your Way
Why Do You Write Like You’re Running Out of Time? My blog posts have been lagging a bit these days. Originally I had established this blog to help me explore the act of writing and build a…
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Waste Warriors, Recycling Queens, and a Whole Lotta [Trash] Love
A friend asked me to help her out at an event the other day. She has created a magical sustainability coaching business that provides support to businesses, homeowners, and humans of all kinds. She helps people understand…
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Long Post Part 2: College days and power plays. Living that sweet, sweet barnacle life.
Thanks Obama. No seriously, THANKS OBAMA. Back when I moved to Colorado, I was wrapping up my Master’s Degree in Health Administration, and I had no idea where it would take me. I knew I wanted to…
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Long Post Part 1: Let me tell you ’bout my best friend, reasons why I became a leader, and why I do not watch the news.
**Caution: This post is long, and kind of old. I wrote it a few months ago but never published it. I had to break it up into two parts so your eyes would stay in place.** Have…
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Death Wishes to You and Yours
I think about death often. Not in a bad way, but in a curious, insightful, peering around the corner sort of way. Recently a friend told me they rarely think of death, and this astounded me. I…
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Mind the Marrow
“I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to…
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How I Became Brave
Yesterday I decided to read some past content that I wrote at the beginning of my writing journey. “Beginning” as in last year, so rid yourself of the images that this has been a long adventure. Like…
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Interview with the [Corporate] Vampires
Let’s talk about interviews, baby. Let’s talk about you and me. Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be. Yes, let’s talk about interviews… …and all of the nonsense games that…
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The Multiverse of Happiness
Think of a time or place that makes you happy, and then multiply that feeling by one million, and that is the tingling sense that does not come around often, but is the emotion we strive to…
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Do Not Mistake My Kindness for Confidence, Nor My Confidence for Weakness
I have not always been this way. I have not always been confident and brave enough to share experiences and perspectives that are somewhat sensible. It took me awhile to get to this place, and it has taken me…
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What Have You Been Up To Lately?
Chitter Chatter Here are random responses I have received from people after deciding to quit my job and pursue a life of parenting, passion-projects, and publicizing my life (had to fit in another “p” word to keep…
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Office Zoos, Innovation Incubators, and the Mother of All Schedules
Ladies and gentlemen, this game is called, “Name The Perfect Work Schedule.” The winner gets a pat on the back to go back to work instead of reading this. And let’s begin. I will start this game…
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Scary Happiness and the Corporate-Corpse Revival
I quit my effing job… The year is 2022, the month is May. Enter me, Jamie, an eager, energetic, seasoned for seven years manager in the healthcare industry. A female leader who put 110% into developing people,…
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This Car Drives Itself (Literally)
[2022 EV Roadtrip – Post #4] It has been awhile since we last spoke. A lot has happened, but not so much that we cannot write about it. This morning I sit in a hotel lobby located…
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Garlic Fries
[2022 EV Roadtrip – Post #3] Friday, July 29, 9:00pm Central time Now Playing: An unknown scary podcast story Saw some suspicious clouds on our way to the next stop. After just having seen Nope, we decided that…
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Dead Wind Turbines
[2022 EV Roadtrip – Post #2] Friday, July 29. Around 6:00pm Central Time Now Playing: Comedy Bang Bang podcast Two stops down, upwards of ten more to go? Maybe less, maybe more, I like the surprise of not knowing…
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EV Roadtrip: CO 2 TN
[2022 EV Roadtrip – Post #1] Friday, July 29, sometime in the early afternoon. Now Playing: It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia podcast We meet again. This time we are in a new ride. Why are we doing…
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